Email 3, sent March 23, 2013
"When we last left our plucky road-trippers, they had left Trenton, IL in good spirits, amazed at their luck (thanks Officer Bojangles), and with a good story to tell. As night crept onward we approached the Indiana state line and our hotel for the night, The Drury Inn. By this point, the speed limit on I-70 kept changing between 65 and 70, so my cruise was set to 70. As we came down a hill, I noticed a pair of headlights, which originated from the median, shining perpendicular to the road. At this point I was going 5mph over the speed limit, and wanting to avoid any additional trouble (one police encounter is plenty for me for the day thank you very much), I turned off my cruise control and went back to 65. Some of you may know from riding in my car, that smooth shifting is not its strong suit. This is especially true when slowing down at a high rate of speed as my vehicle is more than willing to go slower than you would like. The result is a noticeable deceleration of the car... even in the dark. That, coupled with my out-of-state-from-a-state-
All I could think was, "Are you shitting me?" I mean, REALLY!? 5mph over is not that much, people had been passing me all evening! "WTF reason is this guy gonna give for having pulled me over (can you tell I was upset?)" Officer Napoleon and his side-kick DEA-jacket came to the passenger side window. Officer Napoleon, "Good evening. Well it's a pretty minor reason I pulled you over. It's because your license plate light is burnt out. That's illegal in the state of Indiana. I'm gonna have to write you a warning." Me, "[Uhhh] Ok. I'm glad to know it's burnt out." When, after the mental jaw-drop and forehead slap, all I really wanted to say was "Seriously?!!!" He then asked what our destination was, both for the night (Terre Haute) and ultimately (Danville, PA). "Well, I'm going to need you to come to the squad car while I write it up." A brief pause (SERIOUSLY!!??), then I said, "Ookaayy." All I could think was, "Say WHAAAA'?" and "[insert Sir Alec Guinness' voice here] This is not the car you're looking for... no really, the closest thing to anything contraband is remnants of catnip on a scratching post." As I walked to the squad car, I wished I'd had the number for Indiana state troopers just to make sure these two guys were legit (turns out they were, I have the lame-o warning to prove it.)
Thank goodness Officer Napoleon had his side-kick sit in the back seat, so I could sit in the passenger seat (to put me at ease I'm sure), while they asked questions and wrote out a warning. Questions included: "Why are you moving to Pennsylvania?" (for a job, I'll be operating on people's chest cavities as a PA) "How old are you anyway?" (this ringer came from DEA-jacket, apparently he hadn't seen my driver's license; I'm 30) "Whoa! I thought you were 21!" (really dude? really?) "No, I've got two Masters degrees and I've decided it's time to get a job and pay back some loans" They didn't quite know how to handle this, but by this point in the questioning they could both tell they had a dud of a car on their hands anyway. After chatting with them for a few minutes (DEA-jacket was a regular chatty Cathy), Officer Napoleon ended with, "What do you think about Colorado's recent legalization of pot?" "Aha!" I thought, "now you've fully revealed what you're after." I answered in a way any politician would be proud of, non-committal and vague with an air of confidence to confuse the masses (in this case just the two state officers). "Well, I think it's going to be tough to regulate given that it's still illegal under federal law. I know a lot of people are happy about it. But I can tell you, I do not envy Governor Hickenlooper's job." Satisfied that they had no reason to search my car, they sent me back to the car with my carbon copy. Within moments, we were back on the road. While they were questioning me, my mom had gotten out of the car to "stretch" and "look at the stars," but mostly to make sure that the two strange men weren't driving off with me as a hostage.
We made it to the hotel where, according to the desk clerk, we learned that this kind of traffic stop is pretty routine along that stretch of I-70. Oh, and there is a super max federal prison a few miles down the road where several famous serial killers have stayed (made me feel much safer to know that...) Needless to say we got a new license plate light the very next morning. The guy at the shop furthered our knowledge by telling us that, according to the police officers he knows, they pull people over for minor things in the hopes of finding drug traffickers. Basically, driving the speed limit, with a burnt out license plate light and Colorado plates in Indiana, painted a giant target on our backs. Ugh.
Day 3 was uneventful. There were a lot of state troopers in Ohio, we did our best not to get acquainted with them. We made it to our final destination late Tuesday night, tired and grateful to have made it safely. Thus ended the journey for us. Moving in and nesting are the next steps.
Good night,
Kristen"
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